7: Tape Loading Error

Let’s go back in time by 25 years for a moment, if you can. I certainly can’t, but let’s just ignore the glaring chronological inconsistency for now. You’re sitting in front of your Fergusson television admiring your favourite games’ loading screen whilst humming to the beep, beeeeeeep loading melody bursting out of the Spectrum’s humble mono speaker.

You start biting your nails.

Hypnotised by the scrolling, fit inducing dance of the border loading signature, your biggest fear is the seven or so minutes that is needed to transfer the game from tape to silicon would be all in vain.

Ahh, i’ve fond memories of playing on my ZX Spectrum back when I was only -2 years old...

Dust on the tape deck; a slight wobble of the joystick interface; an intergalactic quantum phenomenon causing an in-balance in the flux capacitor. All potential causes for the ‘R Tape Loading Error’ message the ZX Spectrum so gleefully flashed onto the screen in an irritatingly mocking fashion whenever it became unhappy.

And it appears, 5 minutes and 43 seconds into loading the game. You scream a muffled cry. There is nothing you can do.

Winding the tape back to the beginning once again; a quick blow of air on the cassette tape and player head; a slight adjustment on the dial controlling the magnetic charge surging through the Earth’s magnetic core and once again you enter the unpredictable world of game loading on Sir Clive’s machine.

Retro Fact: Limited color palettes often led to mild comedy racism.

You press the “J” button followed by “” and the ‘enter’ key, priming the computer for action. The ‘Play’ button on the tape deck is pressed setting the wheels in motion once again.

You hear the first beeeeeeep, beep with the expectation of seeing the game’s title jump onto the screen. It doesn’t. You run down the street screaming for your mummy.